SHADOWS ON THE WALL

Tomorrow I once again brave the wilds of Birmingham, Michigan (where my best pal Jeff Sherwood first sprouted man hair) to catch the screening for Captain Sugartit's... er... Mel Gibson's Mayan epic, Apocalypto. I'm actually looking foward to this because I haven't yet figured out whether Mel's a genius or stark raving loopy. Whatever the verdict, he's a helluva filmmaker. When the paper runs my review I'll be sure to link to it.

Of the films I've reviewed recently, Borat, The Departed, and Flushed Away are worth your time. The Fountain is interesting for the brave at heart and though some will disagree, I enjoyed The Prestige and Stranger Than Fiction. Stay away from Bobby and For Your Consideration. Both are major disappointments.

So, in celebration of my favorite medium, this issue of rustedeye is dedicated to the wonderful world of movies!

1. My good buddy and writing partner in LA, Brian Robinson, has started a series of films called CONTRARY. I think they're damn nifty. Check out Branding (my favorite) and Hair Badge.
2. George Lucas once again intend to work his update magic and bring new life to a classic piece of musical cinema: Singin' In The Rain: The Special Edition.
3. This is a particularly disturbing take on Calvin And Hobbs thanks to the sickos at Robot Chicken.
4. Ditto for It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.
5. And this is my absolute favorite Robot Chicken skit.
6. Hearts and Minds. Watch as America's finest torment Iraqi youngsters with a bottle of fresh water. Are these the troops we should be honoring? Shameful.
7. Daredevil lives! This TV news magazine story is truly amazing.
8. And finally, Patrick Stewart was here in Ann Arbor for the last three weeks performing in the Royal Shakespeare Company's Anthony And Cleopatra and The Tempest... neither of which I could get a ticket for. So, as payback, I offer up this moment of performance gold.

COOL STF 4 U - TMOT! (BEG)

If you are wondering what the hell I'm saying, you just aren't part of the Instant Text Message culture. Don't worry, I'm not either. But our kids are gonna be (if they're not already) so you'd better get with the program.

I'll start you off... BEG stands for Big Evil Grin. Now, go out and learn the lingo.... In the meantime, I offer up these yummy links! ...LD! ("later, dude")

1- Teach your kid how to defeat Goliath. Make your own slingshot.

2- Make your own warning label. Here's one I came up with...

3- Get a weekly review sent to your email from that most excellent magazine, Harper's.

4- Just in time for the holidays... THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER HOLIDAY PAGEANT. Now, this is what I call theater! If anyone sees this thing, please please please post a review here. If you don't know who the Pastafarians are... all I can say is that you're damned to eternal meatball hell.

5- And finally... if you still haven't found me the perfect Christmas/Chanukah/Kwanzaa present, here's another not so subtle hint.

INFECTIOUS

The best laid plans...

...got hobbled by a crushing bacterial bug this weekend. So, my posts are a little late. Mea culpa.

Why is it that the only time I get to indulge in countless hours of sleep is when I'm too sick to enjoy them. Between Saturday and Sunday morning I racked up 16 hours or so of snooze time. Had I been healthy, this would have ranked as one of my best vacations ever. Unfortunately, it was a bodily act of necessity.

I certainly hope your Thanksgiving was more enjoyable than mine.

Whenever I'm holidaying (feel free to use this nifty new verb) news of the world fades from view. Thus, I was surprised to discover that esteemed filmmaker Robert Altman passed away. If any of you saw his last film, A Prairie Home Companion, it was pretty obvious that mortality was on the director's mind. Too bad it wasn't a better film.

Anyway, here are a few news items you may have missed:

1. Strange justice is better than no justice at all. [link]
2. How do you say "plausible deniability" in Russian. [link]
3. Ah, yes, the little known "simulating weapons of mass destruction" provision in the Patriot Act. Good thing the arrestees were only zombies. [link]
4. So, this 16 year old actress signs up to play the Virgin Mary in the Christian film feature The Nativity Story and... stop me if you've heard this one before... [link]
5. And finally, a heart warming story involving a skate park. Really. [link]

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

"You say grace before meals. All right. But I say grace before the concert and the opera, and grace before the play and pantomime, and grace before I open a book, and grace before sketching, painting, swimming, fencing, boxing, walking, playing, dancing and grace before I dip the pen in the ink. "
~G.K. Chesterton

1. Need to create the ultimate family slideshow? Check out this awesomely nifty freeware. The hitch? You gotta share with the worldwide web. [fliptrack link]

2. A truly worthy cause: Ukes For The Troops.

3. If you're a female be glad you didn't make the list.

4. Inspire! Focus! Insult! The ultimate Christmas / Channukah / Kwanzaa gift -- make your own motivational poster.

5. Beware the Phantom Paw! (thnx Jeff Sherwood)

Mark Twain once said, " Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed." Inspired by that thought, I thought I'd wax poetic on the multitude of things I'm grateful for. It was bound to be ironic. Instead, I decided to distill things down to the basics. Inevitably, I arrived at a list of cliches. But sometimes cliches are the truest facts of life ...and, from time to time, it's good to be reminded of the obvious. So, without further ado... I am thankful for:

My sons.......................................Good conversation
My wife.........................................Restful sleep
My friends.....................................Books
Family..........................................Movies
Good neighbors.............................Music
Clean water...................................Fresh air
Healthy food..................................A walk in the woods
Spices..........................................Wind chimes
The beach.....................................The mountains
Cool sheets, warm blankets, deep sleep
The opportunity to express my creativity, opinions and concerns
A glass of milk with a freshly baked chocolate chip cookie
Potato chips, pizza and ice cream

I'll be back posting on Friday. Until then, enjoy your holiday!

STUFF YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU NEEDED TO KNOW...

1- A urinal shaped like a woman's mouth. Who could possibly be offended by a thing like that? [link]

2- Ever wonder how many condoms you could wear at one time? Wonder no more... [link]

3- Stop the presses! This just in... car salesmen can't be trusted! [link]

4- How the rest of the world viewed our midterm election. [link]

5. Robert M. Gates for Secretary Of Defense? [link] Meet the new boss. [link] Same as the old boss. [link]

6. RUSTEDEYE EXCLUSIVE: Democrat's plans once they take control of Congress. [link]

ONE LAST TRIP...

Здравствуйте! Since my best buddy from college has lived in Russia for the last 13 years I thought it quite remiss of me to skip over his adopted homeland on my trip around the world. So, in honor of the former yet glorious Soviet Republic I humbly offer up two video links:

• Watching this video of the Moscow City Subway I can't help but think of the song Synchronicity II by The Police where Sting sings, "...packed like lemmings into shiny metal boxes..." I get claustrophobia just watching the thing.
• Welcome to the Lefortovo Tunnel in Russia. Procede at your own risk!

LET'S TAKE A LITTLE TRIP AROUND THE WORLD

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Today's links take us on a global journey of entertainment and enlightenment. Please secure your belongings in the overhead bin, put away your tray tables and fasten your seatbelt.

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Because you're strapped into what amounts to a flying petri dish, don't be surprised if you develop: strange rashes, flu-like symptoms, an itchy scalp, halitosis and foot fungus.

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No you cannot have a second bag of pretzels!

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Before we take off, no trip to the airport would be complete without a tale of TSA and airline idiocy:

• 4 out of 5 terrorists prefer the rubberband ball as their weapon of choice
• "Put that thing away! Don't you realize carry-on liquids are prohibited?"

Now that we've cleared the gate, settled into our seat and forced the armrest down between ourselves and the immense guy next to us, we can read up on first destination: Bolivia, home to the most dangerous road in the world!

Next stop: London, where Jedi Knights fight for 'interstellar' human rights. (Once they get them, they'll call their mom to come pick them up).

A quick ride on Eurail delivers us to Glasgow where rumor has it, U2 frontman Bono was responsible for mass murder.

From their we travel to the cradle of civilization. While vacationing in the Middle East, it's important to keep your head down and learn how to regain control of your camel.

Our last stop before returning home is the land of the rising sun where we meet the David Copperfield of Japan (stick with the video... the trick is truly amazing).

Now that we're back home in the good 'ol US of A we can indulge in a little Nevada -style xenophobia, refuse to trim the hedges for queers in Houston, and honor black World War II heroes in Georgia by segregating them from their more heroic white counterparts.

Finally, no trip would be complete without a few photos of all the famous places we visited.

Thank you for flying with Air Jeph!

QUICK HIT

Today's busy, busy busy, so I offer up a trio of videos for your entertainment and enlightenment.

1- The first is probably one of the best animated pieces I've seen on the web in a while. It's not that the CG is mind blowing but rather that the story is so incredibly bittersweet. It's amazing how much this sad but joyful little film got under my skin.





2- This amusing faux commercial is for the ultimate cell phone. Who knew the Poles could be so funny?




3- And finally, in a place between madness and desire, one man provides the voice for hundreds of films. That man is Don LaFontaine. [link]

EYESUEDE TYRE, RUDEST EYE... OR FUN WITH WORDS

I discovered this nifty site that will make an anagram of your name (or anything else you might enter). Rudest anagram of RUSTEDEYE? Why that would be TURD SEE YE.

John Maynard Keynes once said, "Words ought to be a little wild for they are the assaults of thought on the unthinking."

With that in mind I offer up these linguistic tidbits:

1. In Latin, the word disco means "I learn." I also think it means "women beware."
2. The origin of the word "checkmate" is the Persian phrase, Shah Mat, which means "the king is dead."
3. The word 'gymnasium' comes from the Greek word gymnazein which means to exercise naked... which, I suppose, was done a lot in ancient Greece. No wonder condoms are called Trojans.
4. The word avocado comes from the Spanish word aguacate which is derived from the Aztec word ahuacati which means testicle. Yum!
5. My pal Jeff Sherwood informs me that, in German, nipple is brustwarze, which consists of brust (breast) and warze (wart). Breast wart. Sexy!
6. In a non-related bit of trivia, actor Lorne Greene had one of his nipples bitten off by an alligator while he was host of Lorne Greene's Wild Kingdom.
7. The names of the three wise monkeys are: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Hear no evil) and Mazaru (Speak no evil). Now, if only they had a monkey for 'Fart no evil.'
8. Anasteemaphilia is an attraction to a person because of a difference in height. Which means, unless you end up with someone exactly your height, we all suffer from this condition.
9. The pound sign (#) is called an octothorp.
10. If you fear offending your foreign hosts, these handy tips will save you the humiliation of a cultural faux pas.

THE PSYCHIC PINCH

Because I'm a film critic for a Detroit paper, I have to drive into the Detroit suburbs for screenings. More often than not they're in Birmingham, which is roughly 45 miles away. The trip entails traveling along three different freeways and a pair of highways (it's not called the Motor City for nothing).

Now, driving the endless and compicated Detroit roadways is always an exercise in frustration and/or imminent violence. In some countries it might even qualify as a bloodsport. The average speed of your fellow traveller is 90mph and in three years I've lived here I can count on one hand how many times I've seen someone pulled over for speeding.

Anyway, I'm on my way to a critic's screening of Stranger Than Fiction last week and in three different instances I was cut off. No biggie, par for the course. One of them, however, decided to add insult to injury and flipped me the bird as he passed. On the way home, two more drivers decided to bull their way into my lane Road Warrior style (though one probably had no clue I was there because she was immersed in a cell phone conversation).

Now, I'm a pretty courteous driver. I let people over when they signal, I never tailgate. I'm a regular Polly Perfect. And I couldn't help but wonder, why can't other drivers be more like me?

The only solution I could think of was the Psychic Pinch.

Here's my vision... everyone, starting at the age of 21, would be granted the power of the Psychic Pinch. Once a day, by sheer force of will you would be able to deliver a skin-twisting pinch to the ass of anyone in your line of sight (though it wouldn't work on children). And I mean a real pinch, the kind that elicits a surprised' "Ow, that really friggin hurt!"

Now, the thing that's great about the Psychic Pinch is that it would be anonymous. You'd never know who gave you one or why (unless there were only two of you in the room). My theory is that if everyone had this power we'd all be a helluva lot more polite, courteous and patient with one another. If you weren't, you became a likely candidate for the pinch. Piss off enough people at one time and your ass could be black and blue for a week.

I imagine a world where good manners and civility actually increased as the day wore on. People would become nicer and nicer to one another... because anyone who hadn't expended their daily pinch would be looking for a deserving target.

Of course I have no idea what to do about the masochists. Tickles?

Anyway, as promised, I'm steering clear of the poltical stuff and offering up links that are a little more effervescent. Enjoy!

MOVIES

1. The Book of Job proves how much of a smug bastard God really is... [link]
2. "Quiet down, Rubes. There's a homoerotic volleyball game to play." [link] courtesy of Jeff Sherwood
3. Spongeback Mountain ('nuff said)
4. If you're a fan of Office Space, this mash up will rock your world. If you haven't seen Office Space, put it in your Netflix queue right now. I said, now! If you don't like Office Space, I can't be your boyfriend anymore.
5. Average Homeboy... hands down the worst demo video you have ever seen.
6. I love this video clip so much I had to embed it on my site. I dare you not to laugh...

NOW YOU KNOW...

1. Fireworks, a dropped set of trousers, what could possibly go wrong? [link]
2. Fireworks, punking your co-workers, what could possibly go wrong? [link]
3. Starlings... or that creepy black cloud from Lost?
4. How to get out of your cellular service contract. [link]
5. The coolest knife rack in the world... in case you were wondering what to get me for Xmas.

HAD ENOUGH OF POLITICS?

Well, it's almost over. Now the jockeying for the 2008 Presidential nomination begins. Ugh.

Tomorrow I'll switch gears and put up some awesome video links (there's one with a baby that I dare you not to laugh at... ), music worth listening to and just some general all-round nonsense.

In the meantime...

1- A Santorum by any other name... read this [link] then this [link] . BTW he lost his Senate seat last night. The picture above is his concession speech. While I loathed many of the guy's positions, I will give him this... he had a decent mission to the poor and voted to support assistance programs pretty reliably.

2- Eminem perfectly captures the mood of the electorate with regard to Iraq and the current administration. Whether you're a fan of hip hop (I am) or not, there's no denying this piece, written in 2004, still resonates today.

3- Here's an issue that almost all voters --Republican and Democrat-- can agree on [link]

4- The 5 states with the biggest E-vote problems. Unfortunately, hotly contested Montana is one of them. [link]

5- Now THAT'S one unpopular republican.

DEMS TAKE BACK THE HOUSE...

The only question now is by how many seats. I'm hoping it'll be by at least 15 (meaning a 30 seat gain). To show you how much of a pathetic wonk I am, I'm pulling for four Dems in particular who are running for the House. Scott Kleeb in Nebraska, Gary Trauner in Wyoming (Dick Cheney's old seat), Victoria Wulsin in Ohio and Tammy Duckworth in Illinois. All are running very competitive races in traditionally conservative districts. The odds are against them but if they win, it could be a real bell weather for change.

Things look shakier with the Senate, however. Missouri, Virginia and Montana are too close to call and the party needs all three to retake control. I have high hopes for all three... but Virginia could be tough. Tennessee has been mentioned as an alternate but I think it's a hail Mary pass at best.

Ned Lamont's loss to Joe Leiberman was particularly disappointing. Not because I hated Joe but because he turned this election into an self-aggrandizing ego-fest. I can't stand any candidate --Democrat or Republican-- who acts as if they are entitled to their office. They are representatives of the people and should behave as such. Leiberman has consistantly shown a disdain for the people he serves and the party he supposedly belonged to. That's part of the reason why he lost the primary. He didn't deserve a second bite at the apple.

Now, before you paint me as a knee-jerk, commie-loving, gay marriage supporting liberal (which I mostly am), I want to tell you about a little election day tradition I have. Every major election I look for at least one republican to vote for. I've been doing this since the late 80s when I lived in Chicago and voted for Jack O'Malley as the Cook County State Attorney. I have almost always been able to find at least one member of the other party to support. The gesture is more symbolic than anything else but it's important to my personal sense of ethics. Today it was for a republican running for U of M's Board of Regents.

Anyway, one thing we can all be thankful for regardless of party affiliation... NO MORE POLITICAL ADS... until the next electionrolls around.

If you voted today, thank you. Democracy cannot work without the particpation of its citizens. If you didn't... well, shame on you.

Here are some more links to pass/waste the time...

1. My favorite political ad this season.
2. Despite what the Christian Wrong would have you believe, many of our founding fathers had serious issues with religion. My main man Benjammin' Franklin, in particular, was a critical deist... a theology I subscribe to enthusiatically. When founding dude Alexander Hamilton (who should have been and would have been president if not for snapperhead Aaron Buhr) was asked why our Constitution makes no mention of God, he answered the our republican wasn't in need of "foreign aid." Anyway, you can read all about it here.
3. Proud moments in Secret Service history. [link]
4. 109 reasons to dump the 109th Congress.
5. Politics distilled. (another oldy but a goody)

VOTING DAY SPECTACULAR

So, I'll be at the polls today casting my vote in what I hope will be a Democratic landslide. This country has been so horribly and criminally mismanaged that I'd support a crate full of vegetables over the current Republican-led Congress. It's weird to think that we may have lived through the single worst presidency in the history of our country. This election is a chance to blunt the effects of two more years of incompetence, corruption and fraud.

Locally, I'm hoping to keep the shifty-eyed heir to Amway, Dick DeVos, from gaining the govenorship. I'm not a big fan of Jennifer Granholm --I think she's been a less than inspired technocrat-- but I have no doubt DeVos would be a complete disaster... especially with a Republican controlled legislature that parallels the thinking of the Bush administration. His position on Intelligent Design alone sends shivers down my spine.

So, if you intend to vote Democrat, get out there early and drag your friends along with you. Help stop the insidious policies of a party more interested in its own power than the good of our country.

With a little luck our votes may actually get counted.

1. Remember the Kerry-Bush debates? Wonder what that box was under Bush's jacket? The truth is revealed here.
2. "Dude, like we are so totally prepared for the really stupid terrorists. The smart ones? Er... not so much." [link]
3. You military-industrial dollars at work. [link]
4. Virginia Republicans prove once again that fair and honest elections mean nothing to them. Read about robo-calls where they claim to be the "Elections Commission" and threaten Democratic voters with arrest if they show up at the polls. The link even includes a recording of the message. [link]
5. I don't know how long it'll be up but you can see all of HBO's documentary Hacking Democracy if you follow the link. It is an eye-opening expose on the vulnerability of our voting system and how our right to free and fair elections isn't safe.
6. Need a voter guide from your state. Get it here.
7. Could this system restore integrity to our voting process?
8. Will The Next Election Be Hacked? Robert F. Kennedy Jr's Rolling Stone article.
9. Hacker recruited to throw election testifies. [link] or here.
10. Ever wonder just how rich you are? Find out here.

MY FAVORITE POLITICAL QUOTES AND

MORE LINKS TO DELIGHT & DISGUST

(links are a surprise this time)

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles.

The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

"Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies." ~Groucho Marx

[prescient clip below from 2000]



"However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results." ~Winston Churchill [link] and [link]



"Noise proves nothing--often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she had laid an asteroid." ~Mark Twain [link]

"Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel." ~John Quinton [link]

"The reason there are so few female politicians is that it is too much trouble to put makeup on two faces." ~Maureen Murphy [link]

"Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other." ~Oscar Ameringer [link]

"Hell, I never vote for anybody. I always vote against." ~W.C. Fields [link]

POLITICS: SOMETIMES ALL YOU CAN DO IS LAUGH

I had a math teacher in junior high -- I can't remember his name but whenever he got mad, the vein in his forehead would thrash around like a crazed weasel (feel free to use that metaphor whenever you like). He was a pretty angry guy. He'd start yelling about something or another and you wouldn't hear a word he said because his forehead was growing tighter and tighter and tighter. The girl who sat beside me --I think her name was Laurie Woodcock-- would always starting wincing, afraid, like me, that the vein would break free of its moorings and pop through the skin. I'd lay even odds the guy didn't make it to sixty.

Sometimes, when I'm reading about the outrageous things our political 'leaders' do in the name of national security or moral values, my face gets flush and I think of that math teacher. I realize, I can't let the bastards get to me even more than they already do.

So, ever cognizant of the damage high blood pressure can cause, these links are here to make you chuckle... rather than upchuck.

1. The Daily Show explains the midterm elections... Schoolhouse Rock style. [link]
2. I've always had a fondness for the daily comic strip Fox Trot. Not because it's brilliant, but because the character of Jason always spoke to the geek in me. Every year he finds an incredibly appropriate Halloween costume to comment on the idiocy of our modern world. This year, he's a touch-screen voting machine. [link]
3. The Kansas Board of Education vs Sanity. [link]
4. "This is not a rebel song..." (an oldy but a goody) [link]
5. And for those of you who just can't get enough black face at your pee wee football games... [link]

EVER WONDER HOW
THAT SWEET LITTLE BABY
BECAME A RIGHT-WING
REPUBLICAN?

Wonder no more! [link]

"TEACH YOUR CHILDREN WELL...

...Their father's hell did slowly go by
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picks, the one you'll know by."
-Graham Nash

Reason number 1067 to hate Wal-Mart (thx Jeff Sherwood!).

LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW, LET IT SNOW

Actually, I am so NOT ready for winter. But it snowed today in Ann Arbor anyway. I can accept that the weather in the Midwest can be downright fickle but, man, I didn't even have time to take down my Halloween decorations. Still, the styrofoam tombstones in our front garden do look kinda cool dusted with the white stuff.

This sudden shift in the weather (it was 54 degrees and drizzly two day ago) gives me a great excuse to post an amazing microscopic photo of a snowflake that I pulled off Wikipedia. (Don't worry, it's legal, the picture's in the public domain).

Anyway, now that we're heading into mid-term election week I figured I'd link to some politically-themed sites and stories. I could go on and on about how disgusted, disillusioned and dis... uh... gruntled (btw, can you be gruntled?) I am with our supposedly elected officials but who wants to read that nonsense. Instead, I'll let you work up your own bile with these juicy tidbits:

1. TSA's War On Moisture claimed its first casualty as screeners denied a diabetic Kiwi chef access to his insulin. The 43-year old man had a severe diabetic attack mid-flight, fell into a coma, and ended up hospitalized for two weeks. Feel safer now? Read about it here.
2. Diebold, George Bush's favorite voting machine company, filed a lawsuit against HBO in an attempt to cancel a documentary that reveals just how inaccurate and insecure their machines are. If the case makes it to trial, Dienold will ask jurors to deliver their verdict via paperless, touch screen computers. Read about it here.
3. Halliburton, Dick Cheney's favorite industrial-military complex, lands a totally sweet $365 million contract: building vast new detention camps. Anyone ever seen the movie, The Seige? I don't know why they can't just use Shea Stadium to detain immigrants like Bruce Willis did. Read about it here.
4. And here's a bit of news that has nothing to do with the fact that our President and Vice-President used to be oil men. Nothing whatsoever. Total coincidence. Really. It's the terrorists (who are on the run, by the way). ... Exxon's third quarter revenue was $99.59 billion... which is greater than the entire annual gross domestic product of the United Arab Emirates ($98.1 billion) or Kuwait ($52.76 billion). Read about it here.
5. And finally... this has nothing to do with politics but I kinda suspect there's a Republican in Congress somewhere just like this guy. "Calling Dr. Scholls..."

ONLY 364 DAYS UNTIL HALLOWEEN

So, last night we ran out of treats at 7:25pm. Even with 465 pieces (and 35 I bartered away from my 4 year-old son) we couldn't meet demand. I feel so ashamed.

Still, the evening was a hoot. Our porch was filled with an endless procession of candy-craving kids. The costumes ranged from inspired to adorable to, occassionally, pathetic. It seems costume creativity is inversely proportional to age. The under 12 set was clearly more ambitious and dedicated than their teenage brothers and sisters.

My son, Nate teamed up with his little buddy Jamie in matching Spiderman costumes (the ones with the rippling chest muscels and six-pack abs sewn in). They sprinted from house to house with gleeful abandon. At one point I asked Jamie's dad, Andy, if he could remember the last time he felt that excited about anything? I'm convinced that if adults could recapture that giddy sense of excitement --say, once a month-- the world would be a much happier place.

Anyway, as a final tribute to my favorite holiday I offer up a few last links:

1. Watch a pumpkin carve itself here.
2. It may be too late to serve bloodied brains for Halloween but with Thanksgiving less than a month away, this dessert is guaranteed to impress the in-laws!
3. Canine Humiliation 101.
4. Cool photos of real-life ghosts or Photoshop invented 100 years ago?
5. The 10 best scenes from The Simpsons' "Treehouse Of Horror" specials.