GOOD CAMPAIGN AD

...pass it on!

Especially to family and frineds who are on the fence about who they're going to vote for.

Really.

OPIE / RICHIE CUNNINGHAM ENDORSES OBAMA

...and so does Andy Griffith and the Fonz. Really.

See it for yourself.

See more Ron Howard videos at Funny or Die

THE POSTER THAT INSPIRED A NATION ... OF POSTERS

You all recognize Shepard Fairey's Obama campaign poster (first printings now selling on EBay for $10, 000), yes?

Well, it's inspired an avalanche of outakes, spoofs, political comment and naked racism. Here's a gallery.

Some are brilliant. Some are appalling. Some made me laugh so hard milk spurted out of my nose.

Still, it's fascinating to see how people riff on pop culture at the speed of light.

Here are a few of my faves...

Dallas Breaks Beach Ball World Record

The video for this is too cool. Who'd a thunk Dallas, Texas could do anything this cool?

Read and watch it here.

IS SARAH PALIN PULLING FOR OBAMA?

I guess when you spend $150, 000 on wardrobe you don't have time to think about what it is you're actually wearing. (check the scarf)

Local blogger Mark Maynard says, "I suspect there’s a gay salesperson at Saks laughing his ass off right now."

Go Dems!

WASSUP!

"Wassup" was one of the most annoying commercial ideas from 2000. Thank you Budweiser. Don't know what I'm talking about. Watch this. Or read about it here.

Now, what makes the video you're about to watch (below) so brilliant is how the filmmakers reunited the cast to make a pointed political statement.

I love the creativity that has come --directly & indirectly-- with Obama's campaign.

BROCCOLI, YUM! ESPECIALLY THE LITTLE HUMAN HEADS

So, Jeff S sent me this blog link where a pair of foodies --Bread And Honey-- discovered an odd detail about the packaging for Cascadian Farm's frozen broccoli....

...little human faces. Yup.

Now, if I were tripping on acid and noticed this it'd totally freak me out.

SARAH PALIN, SMART PEOPLE ARE THE ENEMY

These two articles make a good case for Palin's suspicion and resentment of anyone who might be smarter than her.... which is a whole heckuva lot of people. Let's not forget it took her 6 years in 5 colleges to finally get a Bachelor's degree in Sports Journalism from Idaho State.

But in Sarah's world that's the same as Barack Obama graduating top of his class at Harvard Law, being the first African-American to head up Harvard's Law Review and his subsequent years teaching Constitutional Law. After being raised by a single mom on food stamps.

Anywho, The New Republic has a terrific article called "Barracuda" that offers an eye-opening profile.

Here's an excerpt:

In 1996, Palin was also asserting herself more and more. For example, she'd demand to know why Stein, the mayor, had "raised the budget." Stein and Carney tried to explain that he'd done nothing of the kind--that, when a city grows, businesses collect more in tax revenue, but that new residents also increase demand for public services. Palin wasn't appeased. She'd say things like, "'Oh, okay. Well, that's the way you think about it,'" Stein recalls. "I was thinking--these are things she should know better. Why is she asking me these stupid questions?"

Carney saw ulterior motives. During a break one evening, he stopped Palin as she was heading to the restroom. "Sarah, it sounds like you're running for mayor," he said, half-joking. Palin turned red and became visibly upset. "What makes you say that? I never said I was running for mayor." "You never denied it, " Carney responded. Palin just repeated herself and stomped off.

Within a few months, Palin was officially challenging Stein and exploiting the cultural shift masterfully. She welcomed a national anti-abortion group in to carpet bomb Wasilla with pink postcards affirming her pro-life bona fides. She orchestrated an NRA endorsement and a mailing from the group falsely proclaiming Stein, a lifelong hunter, "anti-gun." (Stein complained to the local newspaper that Palin was telling voters he wanted to "melt down" all the firearms in the state.) And, in a move practically out of
Karl Rove's playbook, she dwelled on how Stein's wife used her maiden name, going so far as to demand a marriage certificate as proof of their nuptials. Palin's campaign literature proclaimed her "deeply devoted to conservative family values"--all in the context of an ostensibly nonpartisan election. (Stein himself was a moderate Republican.)

And then there's Andrew Sullivan's observation that:

Here's one way to look at the question: how has Palin brought up her own kids? Her eldest son is a high-school drop-out. Her eldest daughter has had, so far as one can tell from press reports, very uneven attendance in high school, and no plans for college. Her other daughters seem to spend a lot of time traveling the country with their mom at tax-payers' expense. I've seen them at several rallies with the Palins this fall. Are they not in school?

The least one can say is that none of her children seems to have been brought up thinking that college is something to aspire to. And her new son-in-law just dropped out of high school as well.

What makes people think this woman should be allowed anywhere near the White House? She's the Tanya Harding of politics. Except instead of working her ass off relentlessly to become a world class skater only to throw it all away by stabbing a teammate in the back, Palin skipped straight to the backstabbing part.

Look, I can sorta understand why Budweiser dudes want to bang her. She's got that naughty librarian thing going on. Go ahead, bang the hell out of her. Just don't vote for her.

P.S. It astounds me that Sarh Palin claims she's just like "small town" folks yet spends $150K in two short months on clothes for her campaign. That's as much as the average American makes in 4 years. Explain to me how she's just like Joe Six Pack?

MAN, I LOVE DAVID SEDARIS

He has a brilliant essay in The New Yorker that scorches the so-called undecided, those who just can't decide between Barack Obama or John McCain. A frined thinks it's really white people who don't want to admit that they'd never vote for a black man. Lord, I hope that ain't so.

Sedaris has a better line of reasoning. Here's a taste...

I look at these people and can’t quite believe that they exist. Are they professional actors? I wonder. Or are they simply laymen who want a lot of attention?

To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it?”

To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked.

Read the rest here.

McCAIN GETS KEY ENDORSEMENT

...from Al-Qaeda.
Along with 'real America' of course.
Read about it here.

Supposedly, the McCain campaign is totally freaking out.
Read about that here.

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WHAT THE PFUCK?

McCain's main spokesperson, NancyPfotenhauer, struggles to defend Sarah Palin's ignorance about the job she's running for. Contrary to the State of Alaska's CEO's explanation, the VP does NOT "get in there and work with the Senate to make policy". They only cast a vote if there is a tie.

That's it.

And they need to be ready to step in should the Prez be unable to fulfill the duties of his office.

Palin's been fearmongering...er... running alongside McCain for more than six weeks. Hasn't anyone given her a job desciption yet?

IT WAS INEVITABLE

Hustler is to release "Nailin’ Paylin." What's it about? Well, what do you think it's about. Truth be told, I'd rather guys buy this video than vote for that imbecilic freak.

...Jerry T. is set to direct, and porn star Lisa Ann will be taking on the role of Palin—er, “Paylin.” According to HUSTLER, “Nailin’ Paylin” is a “naughty adventure to the wild side of that sexy Alaska governor,” featuring “girl-on-girl lovin’,” “nailing the Russians, who come knocking on her back-door,” and a younger Palin getting seduced by her creationist college professor who “will explain a ‘big bang’ theory even she can’t deny!” Also included: a three-way hardcore sex scene starring porn stars as Palin/Paylin, Hillary Clinton, and Condoleezza Rice. Of course, no political porn satire would be complete without a salute to Fox News—a Bill O’Reilly stand-in will announce the movie’s multiple sex scandals as they unfold.

Here's a taste of the script:

(Open on the PALIN residence, Wasilla, Alaska. Evening. Governor SARAH PALIN is sitting on the couch, reading "all of the magazines." She is wearing a satin negligee and bunny slippers. Her luxurious brown hair is in a bun. Her glasses rest just so on the bridge of her nose. TODD is out of town on business. TRIGG is peacefully asleep upstairs. There is a firm knock at the door. PALIN puts down her reading material and goes to answer it.)

PALIN: Who is it?
GRUFF MALE VOICE: It's JOE, the tanning-bed repairman.

(PALIN unlocks the door and opens it)

PALIN: Hiya! You were supposed to be here two hours ago, doncha know?
JOE: I'm sorry. My snowmobile broke down outside of Matunska. I had to walk the rest of the way.
PALIN: Well, you're in luck. I just baked a batch of chocolate-chip cookies. Why don't you come inside and I'll fix you a plate of 'em?

(JOE obliges. He takes a seat on the couch. PALIN enters the kitchen and returns shortly after with the cookies. She gives them to JOE, but not before looking him up and down.)

PALIN: My oh my. That's quite a toolbelt you have on. It looks heavy.
JOE: I have a big hammer.
PALIN: Oh, I betcha do. I love a big hammer. But I love screwdrivers, too! And wrenches. The fact is I love and respect all of America's diverse tools, big and small. They're what helps make us so great as a nation. Here, let me take that off for ya.

(PALIN takes a seat on the coach beside JOE and starts to undo his belt. He stops her.)

JOE: Let's go take a look at the tanning bed first.
PALIN: Oooh, okay.

(PALIN leads JOE to the tanning salon in the basement. JOE carefully inspects the machine.)

JOE: Looks like there are just a bunch of screws loose.
PALIN: (seductively) You're in luck. I fully support off-shore and on-shore drilling.

(PALIN pounces on JOE and throws him onto the top of the tanning bed. She quickly rips off his jeans.)

PALIN: God almighty! You are hung like a moose. Now I have to eat ya!
JOE: I'm bigger than a moose. Do you have any contraceptives?
PALIN: It's okay. I already took a morning-after pill.
JOE: Um, are you sure it works that way?
PALIN: Are you asking me if I know what a morning-after pill is? Because I totally do! I'll get back to ya with specifics.

(The two proceed to make furious love in a multitude of positions. PALIN amply demonstrates that she has enough experience.)

PALIN: Fuck me harder! HARDER! Pound me until my head is so empty that I can't even remember the name of the one Supreme Court case I actually know! I want it to burn. Burn like a banned book. Oh God, Oh God, OH MY GOD! MAKE ME SEE RUSSIA FROM HERE!

THE GOOD WILL THAT ELECTION SEASON BRINGS

With all this talk about the Pro-American and Real American regions in our country why is it always Republican supporters who commit acts of violence and vandalism, and say the most awful things? Funny that. I guess that's just the way 'real Americans' express their patriotism.

Here are a few heart warming tales from the front...

1- Voting machines malfunctioning. Who woulda guessed? Explanation... the machines have problems with humidity. Good thing they're in a state like Florida, huh?

2- Obama sign replaced with a Confederate flag. Stay classy, Chester, Virginia!

3- Chicago Tribune endorses first Democrat for President. Ever.

4- Sarah Palin unable to correctly answer a third grader's question: What does the Vice President do? Apparently no one's told her yet.

5- RNC spends $150K on Palin's campaign wardrobe. Now there's someone who understands the plight of people struggling on a middle class income!

6- Guy in Ohio lynches Obama in effigy. Stay classy, Mike Lundsford!

7- Al Jazeera interviews Palin supporters. You don't see this on CNN.



8- So, who attends a Sarah Palin rally? Watch the video to witness how real Americans act. Don't you just love the guy who thinks Obama is a monkey? I think I just threw up in my mouth.




9- Finally, just who are the 15% of Americans who think the country is on the right track.

YES WE CARVE!

CAN YOU SPELL "IRONY"

'nuff said. Read all about it here.


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THE EVER-DEPENDABLE JACK CHICK...

...takes on all those Jesus-haters who think Halloween is cool. Well, actually, just the vampires.

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FUNNY... AND OH-SO TRUE

I'm not the biggest Family Guy fan (I always preferred The Simpsons) but I just may have to give the show another chance.

Plus, who knew Nazis loved caricatures so much?

Love the laser blast.

CREEPY... BUT BEAUTIFUL

Dave Bullock is a Los Angeles photographer with really impressive credentials. He takes amazing photos of industrial landscapes. Imagine what he could do here in Detroit!

SCARE THE HELL OUT OF YOUR FRIENDS

Show up at your liberal friend's Halloween costume party in one of these and you're guaranteed to make them pee their pants.

Make children cry, animals cower under furniture and the unAmerican parts of America quake in fear.

Free downloads of these mask are available right here. Get 'em while the getting's good!

THIS GUY IS AMAZING

All Hallow's Eve is coming.

I linked to this guy in my blog last year but he's so damn good I had to do it again.

It kinda makes my badly hewn triangular eyes, nose and mouth jack-o-lanterns look pretty pathetic.

Good thing I use real human heads.

JOHN CLEESE WEIGHS IN ON SARAH PALIN

I think he's too kind.

CIRCUMSUPERSIZED

Go to Florida and convince you grandparents to vote for Obama.

Jeff S, you can just work on your Mom. Failing that, confuse her about the election date. Seriously.

GOT A QUESTION FOR SARAH PALIN?

Like why she thought it was okay to charge rape victims for their own rape kits? Or maybe, how we should evaluate "Alaska's CEO" (her quote) after leaving her former hometown $20 million in debt after serving as mayor (it had a $5 million surplus when she took office)? Or whether she thinks dinosaurs and man roamed the Earth together six thousand years ago?

The California Democratic Party came up with a brilliant way to ask Sarah Palin all those questions her faithful might forget to ask at a rally in LA on Saturday. They rented a giant electronic billboard and placed it across the street from the election stop, posting questions for Wasilla's most famous citizen.

The questions are submitted via text message or by going to this site and entering your own.

Live streaming video by Ustream

Don't you love technology?

If the video embed doesn't work go directly to the site.

SEINFELD CIRCA 1972

My friends, this makes me laugh.